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Irish Emotion

As we arrive near the end of yet another season of Notre Dame football, the Irish are poised for a second consecutive BCS appearance. Although we experienced another emotional rollercoaster this season, one thing will never change for Irish fans in good times and in bad: watching a Notre Dame game is a visceral experience. A series of emotions are evoked which are universally shared by those who love the Irish, and universally ridiculed by those who do not! With the Holidays upon us, I felt it appropriate to summarize the Irish Emotions below.

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Preseason Joy

Not to be confused with early Holiday tidings, this is the feeling we all share beginning in the spring around the Blue Gold game. It continues on through the summer as we receive our tickets won through the lottery, and builds to a frenzy as fall practice begins. This is the time when anything is possible; National Championship, Heisman Trophy, preseason rankings, top recruits signing up. It's one of the best times to be an Irish fan.

Emotion personified: Charlie Bucket

2006: After a triumphant debut season by new head coach Charlie Weis, expectations are high. We have everyone returning, including Heisman candidate Brady Quinn. Gracing the cover of every preseason magazine, Notre Dame is a legitimate National Title contender. It almost makes you want to sing, "I've got a golden ticket!"

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Expectant Satisfaction

This is when we get those nice wins against Navy, Purdue, Washington and others. It feels good to watch the game, but you can't be too happy because you we're supposed to win. Watching the game is a pleasant experience, and maybe you even flip around to check some other scores during commercials. Afterwards, you are able to carry on like any other normal day.

Emotion personified: Charles Montgomery Burns

1996: Navy game on Nov 2, my senior year. A nice 54-27 win on the road. Excellent Smithers, it's all going according to plan!

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I Can't Watch This Anymore

This emotion, pioneered and perfected by some of the most ardent fans, occurs when the trainwreck seems imminent. You see the little mistakes, and they begin to add up. Something bad is coming and you just can't take it anymore. Not dissimilar to watching a bad horror movie, you yell at the screen, get up and walk away. For most Irish fans, this occurs somewhere just after halftime. For others, 8 minutes into the first quarter.

Emotion personified: Gone fishing

1991: Tennessee game on Nov 9. After ND gets out to a huge 31-7 lead, Tennessee tears up Craig Hentrich's ACL and pulls off an amazing comeback victory 35-34. To this day I cannot listen to Rocky Top without feeling that same pain.

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Terrible Loss Rage

These are the losses that sting. Not your loss to Michigan at the Big House, or a tough loss on the road in West Lafayette. I'm talking just getting your hat handed to you. It's so bad, you just can't turn it off. Maybe the next few days you're embarrassed to wear any ND gear out in public. Eventually, the sting fades and anger builds up. These are the losses that usually lead to a coach getting the axe. They also lead to my former ND roommate throwing knives and breaking videos!

Emotion personified: The Incredible Hulk (You wouldn't like me when I'm angry!)

1985: Miami game on Nov 30. Jimmy Johnson pours it on, scoring early and often at Miami. The final score is 58-7. Gerry Faust resigns after the season.

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Glorious Victory High

These are those great games during which time stops, the stars align and the luck of the Irish leads to jubilation. Everything goes our way leading to pure joy. Typically dubbed The Game of the Century, ESPN Gameday is usually nearby. Very closely related to Terrible Loss Rage, the distinguishing factor is that we win! Post-game celebrations are the stuff of legends. Winning a Heisman also fall into this category.

Emotion personified: Wilbur "Shooter" Flatch

1992: JoePa and the Nittany Lions come to South Bend Nov 14 during a snowstorm. Trailing late, Rick Mirer leads a 4th quarter comeback capped by a TD pass to Bettis and a two-point conversion to Reggie Brooks for a 17-16 win. Recovering alcoholic assistant coaches everywhere jump around on their beds like crazy men!

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National Championship Ecstasy

Only occurring twice in my lifetime (only one of which I was old enough to be aware of), this is why we follow Notre Dame football. Ideally, any ND alum must drop everything and make a pilgrimage to the site of the title game. For those unable to attend, a HUGE party is thrown to watch the game. The party does not end until the next season begins. An unavoidable side-effect, this emotion causes all previously described emotions to intensify.

Emotion personified: General Zod

1988: ND beats Major Harris and the Mountaineers in the Fiesta Bowl on Jan 2, 1989 to win it's 11th consensus National Championship. Of course we were #1 in a final poll in 8 other seasons, but who's counting. All powerful and deserving of worship... Kneel Before the Irish!

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Going Toonces

The most dreaded of all emotions, this is reserved for those losses that will live on in infamy. It starts with the highest of highs, always closely following Glorious Victory High detailed above. Usually, you are still celebrating. Everyone is all smiles, and it's just a beautiful day to be Irish.

Soon, it becomes painfully obvious that something is wrong. The party is over, but there is still a chance to salvage the day. The tantalizing National Championship Ecstasy is still within reach. With new resolve, every fiber of your being focuses on the task at hand even while realizing that it's going to end very badly. Usually prayers are begun.

Then it's all over. Crash and burn. Tears are unavoidable. All clothing and paraphanelia associated with the game must be destroyed. Those around you speak at their own risk. Usually, one unusual occurance associated with the game bears the irrational blame. The polar opposite of National Championship Ecstasy, all other emotions are subsequently tempered - at least until the voices in your head stop!

Emotion personified: Toonces the driving cat

1993: After winning that year's Game of the Century against Florida State the previous week, the Irish are ranked #1 and headed for a 12th national title. It all ends on Nov 20 when BC beats us 41-39 on a last second field goal. I still blame my ex-girlfriend who came to her first ND game that week - she should have stayed home!

No Apologies for the Irish Schedule!

I read post after post from ND bashers, as well as listen to media reports about how weak our football schedule is. For any ND fan, it is obvious that this is just sour grapes. Bitterness that we maintain our independence abounds in college football. However, I would like to point out a few facts to all the Vol, Gamecock, Big Ten and other random Irish haters out there.

Our schedule is set 5 to 10 years in advance. I actually carry an advanced schedule in my pocket through 2010. It is very hard to predict title contenders that far in advance, so some seasons our schedule lines up tougher than others. We also have a number of traditional rivals that will always be on our schedule. USC is obvious. A couple Big Ten teams are always scheduled. We play a Big East team or 2 to help the conference out. We participate in every other sport, so it is fair as a good partner. I find it funny that some Big East teams (Pitt) begrudge us that good faith. Most teams jack up ticket prices for ND, and many season tickets are bought by ND fans just for the ND game! Again see Pitt.

And the service academies are always present. I would like to discuss this a little further. College football owes a lot to the epic Army - ND games of the early 20th century. They pushed the sport into the national picture before even the NFL was a force. Navy is a similar long standing tradition, and Air Force to a much lesser degree. We always have one scheduled, and every once in awhile 2. Is it so bad to maintain tradition? How can this even compare to LSU tking on a D-II school in Apal. State (on the heels of North Texas). Show me one schedule that doesn't have a perenial doormat on it - wait Stanford did have to take on juggernaut Cal-Davis!

That would be enough, but people are still ripping us nonstop! To answer concerning 2005, our schedule was BRUTAL to start the season. Every publication ranked us a Top 10 for SOS. I saw us as high as #6. 4 of our first 5 games were away. Everyone here remembers the ESPN morons predicting a 1-5 or 0-6 start! Let's run through it:

Sep 3, 2005       at Pittsburgh     Preseason #23
Sep 10, 2005      at Michigan       Preseason #4
Sep 17, 2005      Michigan State    Big Ten opponent
Sep 24, 2005      at Washington     Ty Bowl
Oct 1, 2005       at Purdue         Preseason #15
Oct 15, 2005      Southern Cal      Preseason #1
Oct 22, 2005      Brigham Young     Whipped us last year
Nov 5, 2005       Tennessee         Preseason #3
Nov 12, 2005      Navy              Traditional opponent
Nov 19, 2005      Syracuse          Big East partner
Nov 26, 2005      at Stanford       Short series opponent

So there you have it. Is it fair to look in hindsight and say these teams were overrated? No way! If you want to use that logic, in hindsight, ND had 1 vote in the preseason AP poll! So we have completely exceeded all expectations and deserve even more credit! I also think ND had a little bit to do with some of these teams taking a slide. We had some demoralizing wins, and hurt a couple key players in the process.

Let it go. We are having a great season, and have earned every win and every vote in the polls. Even if you hate us, you know you're afraid of Weis gameplanning aginst your team! From irrelevent to relevent in 2 games this season!

Dre + Ben = SOLID GOLD

So as a little insight into what's playing on my MP3 player (no, no iPod yet, dammit), one of my favorite singers is Ben Folds. Not only are his original songs great, but he has the ability to improvise and cover just about anything you could imagine. A good example is his infamous track "Rock This Bitch" from his album Ben Folds Live.

So how could Ben ever top that little gem? I have two little words for you, Dr. Dre. A little number off the classic gansta' album The Chronic. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Bitches Ain't Shit. Prepare to laugh your butt off.